I like to work at coffee shops. They are great places for me to be productive. But I tried a new coffee shop a few weeks ago - and I hated it. The space was uncomfortably still and quiet. The music was too soft, the staff were mostly in the back, and other customers whispered their conversations. I stayed an hour and got little accomplished. I was uncomfortable.

You might think I’m crazy, a quiet and still space might be what you love. But I think most people are like me. Stillness and quiet can lead to loneliness, even within a group of people. We are communal creatures in our nature.

And that’s as true for meetings and presentations as it is for email and solitary work. I’ve been in so many demos, meetings, and presentations that were uncomfortable - we all have. One person talks with no listener engagement and then everyone leaves. That might be fine for a very large group or church - but it’s doom for a sales presentation.

Confession time: I’ve not only been a participant but I’ve also been the presenter in those meetings. Usually I have so much nervous energy that I can’t wait to leave; to walk out of the room and find someone to talk to. It’s miserable for all involved.

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When I started giving presentations I didn’t like questions. They threw me off my talk track and I felt like the questions indicated I was showing the wrong content. If people stood up and walked around I felt like they were subtly telling me that I was boring. But I realized that I do those same things when I am a participant and not a leader. I move around and I ask questions. Those activities are not signs that a presenter is off base or boring. That was just me being self-conscious and not focusing on the needs of my customer.

We aren’t designed to be motionless. We aren’t designed for silence. We are designed for life in community, and that involves moving around and engaging with one another. Look at kids in school. When I was young we were supposed to sit quietly at our desks - that was a challenge at best. Adults are the same. In order for us to fully absorb and engage with content we might sit still for a while but we have to shake it out.

So, I’ve evolved my approach a lot. Where I formerly didn’t like movement and questions I now encourage them!

The best way to make an audience feel like they can move is for you to move. One of the most interesting psychological phenomena is Mirroring. The principle is that your audience will subconsciously do what you do. When you move you subconsciously give your audience permission to move.

Want people to say yes? Nod your head yes when you ask a question. Want your audience to feel it’s acceptable to grab a snack or stretch their legs in the back? Then you walk around the stage. Don’t be stationary behind the podium, move around.

You don’t need to go overboard with it. But, the movement will be as good for you as it will for the audience. Everyone gets a rush of adrenaline before they present to an audience - everyone. Don’t bottle that energy up. Let yourself move. That will let the adrenaline work itself out and allow your brain to relax and focus on you content. It will reduce the perceived tension in the room. And you’ll begin to see an audience meaningfully engage with your content.

Depending on how well your audience know each other you may have an easy or challenging time initiating questions and dialogue. If they know each other well and are friendly then dialogue will come naturally. You may even get more than you want. But reigning in too much conversation is far better than receiving too little.

Large group presentations such as conferences, user groups, or at companies that have remote teams or lack personal connections might be harder to initiate dialogue with the audience.

I frequently see presentation end with “Any questions?” Sometimes that works but for quiet audiences or those that are not yet over the “uncomfortable hump” you need to adjust your tactic.

I think “any questions” phrase often fails for two reasons that are linked. The first is it takes us back to high school. A professor would chew up an entire class with a monologue then invite questions. If users are engaging with content then questions will arise during the lecture. By the end most questions have been forgotten. Secondly, that approach to questions is not welcoming. People who have questions might feel like they are the only one that didn’t understand, like they are dumber than others. The audience is disincentivized from asking questions.

How then can we invite that engagement? I’ll share two ways I do it. One is physical and the other is how I ask for questions:

For starters, be physically open. Step out from behind a podium (movement), offer a smile, give a slight “yes” head nod, spread your arms a little and open your palms. It’s a position of openness. In all cultures it’s a sign that I’m not here to hurt, I’m here to help. Watch wildlife tv shows, when people approach animals that are injured they adopt this open position. It invites comfort and comfort is the foundation for engagement. Try it in the mirror and you’ll see.

The second way is with your words. Instead of the curt “any questions” expression, try these:

Phrases like these validate questions. It aligns you with customers, and those that paid attention likely have questions, and that questions are expected. This gives your audience the permission to ask questions. You remove feelings of shame or that they missed something - your audience is now partnering with you to clearly share your material. You have aligned yourself as their champion and not as their lecturer, and that is a powerful change.

Alternately, you can also ask a question of the audience: “Have any of you tried this before?” or “Do you think this approach would work for you?”. I recommend asking questions early in the presentation. That can foster ongoing dialogue. Waiting to the end can be tricky because it’s probably too late to create the desired environment. Additionally, since feedback has been minimal throughout we don’t have a sense for what the audience is feeling - silence at the end isn’t a great look and negative feedback is even worse. So, if you can foster that dialogue early.

I recently led a technical lab as part of a larger conference. There were about 60 attendees. In groups that size it can be hard to get audience engagement. So, I used the tools outlined above to build a comfortable space:

I hope I’ve shared why it’s so important to create a space that encourages movement and conversation; plus provided a few tactics to create that environment. There are many factors that go into enterprise sales but the expression “People buy from those they like” is often true. By creating a space where people feel comfortable you will have a platform for relationships to develop. That’s the foundation for building friendships and becoming someone your customers trust and like.

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Those are my thoughts based on my experiences. Have you felt the same? If so, would you share your strategies for encouraging engagement? Alternately, do you disagree or think I’m completely wrong? Let me know. I’d love to hear your thoughts and why.